Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
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