i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
Randomize