i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
I made him laugh his dick is mine
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
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