I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Randomize
