bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Randomize
