So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
