sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
Four minutes until I can fart!
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Randomize