Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
This is the worst date ever. Pls kill me. No, wait, scratch that, stick to the original plan of killing Paris Hilton, I'll live though this
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
Randomize
