It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
you win again, gameday.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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