dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
