Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
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