it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
Quick, to the slutcave!
false alarm. still invincible.
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize
