I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
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