I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize
