I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
i woke up today to a handjob from this really fat girl that keeps calling me michael phelps
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
