i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
Randomize
