He had one of those small greek statue penises
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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