I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
i barfeds in our rink
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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