Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
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