What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
Randomize
