I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
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