I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Randomize
