benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
