We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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