Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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