I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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