Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
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