That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
Randomize
