Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
