We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
Randomize
