in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
Randomize
