Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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