Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
Randomize
