Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
my phone is just a graveyard for last nights mistakes. at least it's giving me hints as to where i was though, i'm like carmen sandiego
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Randomize
