Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize
