Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Randomize
