So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize
