My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
