That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
My pussy is not your playground.
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
Randomize
