margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize
