you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
Randomize
