I think scott just propositioned me for sex
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
