69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
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