I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
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