Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
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