so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
meet me in the bathroom in 10 mins.
wait what? who are you hooking up with in the bathroom?!
aww shit wrong text.
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
My new roommate looks like a troll. Or a serial killer. So if I disappear, show this text to the cops.
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