I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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