Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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