Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
