So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Randomize
