We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
my phone is just a graveyard for last nights mistakes. at least it's giving me hints as to where i was though, i'm like carmen sandiego
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
