NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
